Why Men Are Saying No to Marriage

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James Parker

4 min read

In today's post, I'll show you the intriguing reasons why an increasing number of men are choosing to opt out of marriage and fatherhood, as discussed in Dr. Helen Smith's eye-opening book Men on Strike.

The insights from this book completely transformed my understanding of the challenges men face in today's society and how I see the marriage.

Let's dive right in.

Legal Landmines

Family courts often prioritize women's and children's rights, leaving men vulnerable to losing their assets and parental rights. This legal imbalance can make marriage and fatherhood feel like risky endeavors for many men.

In addition, men are hesitant to take on traditional roles because they lack legal protection. This is especially true in cases of false accusations or child support disputes.

Winner of child custody rights

Economic Instability

In today's ever-changing economy, many men find it challenging to fulfill the traditional role of provider. The decline of stable, well-paying jobs, especially in the blue-collar sector, has made it difficult for men to support a family.

The economy is unstable. Living costs are high. Paying alimony or child support is a financial burden. These factors can complicate starting a family.

Negative Portrayals in Education and Culture

Men are often portrayed negatively in popular culture and the educational system. They are shown as incompetent, lazy, or dangerous. This negative representation can have a profound impact on men's self-perception and can discourage them from embracing traditional roles such as fatherhood and marriage.

The lack of positive male role models in media and education further contributes to this problem, leaving men needing more guidance and support to navigate these roles successfully.

The Ripple Effect on Society

The decline in stable families and the rise in social problems are significant concerns that can arise from this trend of men opting out of marriage and fatherhood. When men disengage from these traditional roles, it can lead to a breakdown in family structures, contributing to issues such as poverty, crime, and educational disparities.

This ripple effect can have lasting impacts on society as a whole, affecting future generations and the overall health and well-being of our communities.

Number Of Marriages in the US

What Can Be Done?

To reverse this trend, Dr. Smith suggests making changes in the legal system, culture, and economy. These changes would make traditional roles more attractive and less risky for men. This could include legal reforms that ensure fair treatment in family courts, cultural shifts that promote positive portrayals of men, and economic policies that support stable, well-paying jobs for men.

By addressing these issues, we can create a more balanced and supportive environment that encourages men to embrace marriage and fatherhood, ultimately promoting a healthier and more stable society.


Now, I'd like to hear from you. Which strategy from this post are you going to try first? Leave a comment below sharing your thoughts or personal experiences.